Those Darn Song Selections

Those Darn Song Selections

For those of you that follow me on Twitter (Hawaii Wedding) you know that waiting for those “darn song selections” is an ongoing process.

In our bridal questionnaire, we not only ask for your wedding ceremony songs but for all of your special moments such as bride and groom entrance, cake cutting ceremony, first dance, father/daughter dance, etc. In addition, we also ask for the demographics of your guests, type of music that you want played , favorite artists and your “do not play” list.

Why do we ask for all of these songs when your wedding may still be months or even a year away?

Actually, the reason is that selecting song selections tends to be the number one procrastinated item in wedding planning , and in many cases, a lot more difficult than couples think. We ask these questions from the very beginning so that during the course of your planning when you listen to music you are more aware of songs and their lyrics and can start deciding the “feel” you want for your wedding.

Our goal is to send out your preliminary timeline with your song selections at least two weeks prior to your wedding day and a final timeline the week of the wedding. This process allows vendors an opportunity to see the entire day at the two week marker and confirm their timing and clarify any discrepancies and they can finish preparations for your wedding day.

What are the potential problems with the delay of providing song selections?

1) Your musician may not know the song, or your DJ may not have the song in their music library. By identifying this early, we can make the appropriate adjustments on the song selection, or the DJ has time to research and add the requested piece to their library for you.

2) Your musician or DJ often has several events in a week’s time with back-to-back gigs, or in some cases other job, so sending your final song selections the night before the wedding may seem like you “made it” but they may not even have time to access their computer before loading up for the next event. Fortunately with internet access, I’ve literally had some DJs that had to download music on-site, but it can potentially (and sometimes has) caused delays.

3) Special performances (i.e.: hula, etc.) can also be a challenge when the performer’s CD does not work, so we always suggest sending a copy to the DJ in advance to allow them time to check the CD before the event day. This avoids potential problems and unnecessary stress later.

4) Disappointment that your special song request is not played.

Why do you ask for our guest demographics and favorite artists?

The more we know about you, the better we are able to serve you. By knowing the demographics of your guests (ages, where they are from, etc.) we have a better understanding of what types of music may be most suitable. Having your list of favorite artists gives the DJ a better understanding of the type of music that you like to hear as well.

Why do you ask for our do not play list?

The typical do not play songs are YMCA, Chicken Dance and the Electric Slide. Ironically, these same songs have also been on the “must play” list for clients that liked the group participation or because it held another significance to them (i.e. bridal party met at Oktoberfest).

The other do not play songs you want to consider are songs that may remind you of a situation or perhaps even a past relationship that you may not necessarily want to be reminded of on your special day. An example of this is when my father-in-law passed away a couple of years ago a DVD slide show was made with a beautiful song on it, but every time I hear that song it makes think of him which brings emotions of happiness and sorrow.

Timelines.........timelines..........timelines

Many of the vendors I work with say "you're always working on timelines" and that is so very true!

Whether I am hired as a "day-of" coordinator, a full service planner or somewhere in between, I am always going to make sure that I review the client's first draft of their timeline (if they have made one) and ensure that everything works!

Timing is one of the most critical elements to a successful and stress-free wedding day. If the schedule that is created is realistic and works for the vendors, everyone works like a very well oiled machine and there is no "drama." Problems arise when a timeline either doesn't allow enough time for what you are trying to accomplish or for those "quick ballroom turns" there isn't enough staff to get the job done within the time frame allotted, or set-up is not prioritized by the order of which your vendors are arriving.

An arriving DJ should never have to wait for his table, as that will impact his set-up time. A hair and make-up stylist should not have to wait around for hair flowers because the florist was scheduled to arrive an hour later. The chef should not be worried about the meal service starting late because the receiving line took 40 minutes instead of 20 minutes.

Timing is one thing that you definitely don't learn from a book. Timing can only be learned from many years of hands-on experience with a wide variety of events.

By the time I have completed your timeline I have literally done a virtual tour in my head of your event knowing exactly what needs to be where and when, how much space is required and who is going to be doing what and when.

It is through this process that I (and the vendors) have a very clear understanding of what the bride and groom envisions for their wedding day, and by asking all the right questions in advance and making the appropriate adjustments my couples may relax and enjoy their wedding.

So the next time you're wondering if I'm working on a timeline......of course I am!